Nanny State

Ah the joys of...

Smoking?

Nope. Not allowed. Bad for you. Bad for your kids, your mum, your nan, the barman, the kids you'd thought of adopting, the kids in your car, your colleagues, your clients and look what it did to that 130 year old Ukrainian woman, she's all wrinkly.

Meeting your mates on the street corner?

DON'T EVEN THINK ABOUT IT!

Erm,

Having an opinion and voicing it?

No sir, that would be contrary to Section 5 of the 'Thought Crime' Bill.

Looking sideways at a child who has fallen and split their skull open on the pavement?

WHAT ARE YOU SOME SORT OF PERVERT?

We the government would like to remind you the proles that we have your best interests in mind and that only we can protect you from cancer, terrorism, yobs or lazy bastards claiming mental illness is a real illness, I mean it's not like you've got a broken bone or anything.

The pound currently stands at 1.11 Euro, making a Euro 90 pence.

It has always stood at 1.11.

The joy of Mehari's

As Paul the brilliant plumber was patiently fixing my boiler this morning, I thought it only polite to light up a Mehari's cigar.

Yes I know it's at least as evil as heroin and will shortly be banned everywhere, but while I can, I shall continue to enjoy the pleasure of their sweet Orient brand.

Paul and I are fast becoming friends.

Last month it was due to the air pressure and the solenoid; this month it seems the fuse has gone and it's replacement was a little more complicated than first anticipated.

Thankfully all is fixed and we can no longer see our breath indoors.

Fingers crossed...